Service

Written By Shayla D Smith

You know Pride hits heavy when a Stronger Man
Walks into the Room.
You'd say,"Pass the Broom."
They would sweep up the room,
And after, clean the broom.
But you are left the weaker man,
Because ,He is not coming back
To sweep up your food and stack up your chairs.
I'll leave that to you.
He'll go somewhere and not drop his food.
We'll sit as a King where the Angels sing.
Somewhere ,in Front -"There's a Great View."
And all this time his heart was better than you.
Now, He sees why you handed him the Broom!

Bipolar Child- Not Forgotten- 9th of Feburary

Written By Shayla D Smith

Working the Mind, the time, land, or hand,
Bringing rosy cheeks
A pink nose
Your Children are who you inspire.
I've been a Mother, a Wife in ways ,a Sister, and a Daughter.
By just keeping myself involved and half-way alive.
Did you grow with the Bounty or....
Did you learn to let that all go?
That part of Me I feel almost died.....
Growing high,
Or down below.
Every Great Man does it without thinking.
You at least have a child, grows deep
You that you hold grows together.
This is what I say to my inner Child...........
"I gave you a new dress and slippers, Cinderella."
I think I can do my make-up better than you!
In all this turmoil and confusion I just want to say,
"Knowledge is Something earned.
It takes patience and it is a gift.
We must be worthy of it and not selfish.
In any gift you have to serve where you feel the Spirit.
Learn how the Spirit feels to you.
It will save you years of your life."

I'm Only Wearing a Mirror- Janurary 30, 2015

Written by Shayla D Smith

Cloudy Memories,
Screams muted,
But We cheered you on.
Just because you knew the score.
And We couldn't drive ourselves home.

Singing Nursery School Songs.
With flat voices.
Too young to realize that we were ...
Contradicting  ourselves.

Making dressing up holy.
Simply because it is impossible to see,
And I don't want to go back.

Weak minds are too Hard on those
They only wish to see.
And don't wish to hear.

I tried to please you.
And you looked the other way.
So, next time ,if You see me around,
You can get that I'm wearing a mirror.

The Truth- Janurary 14th

Written by Shayla D. Smith

Found a Savior Divine.
Seen in Someone else's Eyes.
Found out I don't know my Mother's,
But they see through my Father's,
They have spoken to Me,
Through a Murderer of Deceit,
And I feel Nub and Dry.
If they knew what was put away
And watered down.
If they knew how much I am blinded
Towards and I am facing now.
They never wanted me to finish school.
They just thought,"She'll bring pleasure to the World."
But I Did not meet them there and I finished the Race.
And now I get my reward.......
Truth and joy,
Respect and health.

Found out that the teachers in my High School had other intentions
for my future than I expected.
I wasn't one who got high grades in High School ,especially in my Engish classes,
but my teachers where concerned about the size of my breasts compared to my sisters
and my shyness around men.
They gave me low grades(I know it sounds silly.) ,like D's because they wanted me to think about this in the future and take it as a sign to get large breast implants.)  It was pretty mean of the teachers, but I did take their advice and I even became a model for 3 years. I had a fun dating life, thanks to some great guy friends and I was an awesome girlfriend when I had boyfriends.  I have a very sensitive heart and my other family members that had attended that School really took their Companions for-granted. They wanted to make sure that my family didn't crush the foundation for a strong home I had created for a happy home and union.  I was ready to move on from learning, they thought, but my mind was recreated by an accident and I started  a new life in many ways.  This poetry is my life anew.  My childhood, again.  I am a new person, but I live my life by the same name and soul.

Humility- January 4, 2015

Written by Shayla D Smith
An answer to prayer came in a walk with my Father.
Not hanging in the closet,
But walking around town
Both of us proud
For we knew no other than what was crucified,
What died for our sins,
A testimony tried ,and over tried,
Still counted our pennies to buy our pair of scriptures,
I guess that is why Jesus died,
So, we could pay our tithing,
Repair that ceiling that is holding us up,
Not hanging in the closet,
But walking around town,
Both of us proud.
My brillance needs no greater expression.
Thoughts seem to be a little distorted,
But then they said, "Look at the lines across the street."
And I say,"The light hath been seen in an open glass."
There are no dirty windows.
Your eyes were simply getting in the way.

Defending Christ and Asking Other's to Take Another Look at The Gospel

Written by Shayla D. Smith

I think that I found a better half for my truths and dedication......
And it was under a rock somewhere.
We'll sing it downtown,
Me, in my Target Shirts
That used to be Roxy......
Until I realized what they meant.
But isn't that what we did to Christ?
Killing our Savior?
The Kings of the Earth!
Now what is left of them.
They all found a Sweetheart....
And She isn't "Playboy!"
Her name was Mom.

From the first breath they craved her
And cried for her touch
To be fed ,cleansed, and talked to.
A mother they respected and cherished.
A bond did grow.
Only when her skin would sag and change
Would these boys look to another Wonder
That would Be a Mother to another
If only they could see Gods face in this way.
As a man loves a woman ,because the Savior
Showed Me how He see's Me
As Peace.

Grace- March 20 ,2014

Written by Shayla D Smith

All this time I thought that I was the victim.
But that is not the case.
You see every time
I try to be kind,
The Savior takes my place.

He knows I turn the other check
And I forget to throw dirt in the other's face.
His words are strong yet patient
As I listen I gain an understanding of his grace.
And if I was the other, what would be my fate.

You see, sometimes He doesn't protect us,
If we are sinning and getting in his way.
So, He allows things to Happen,
But He loves us
And still shows us a way

Take Heaven Onward!- April 5, 2014

Written by Shayla D Smith

Virtuous One,
Though Heart soft,
You steadied Yourself,
Won the Battle Today,
Listened Longingly.

My Anger is upon those
Who Mock you in my Face.
You promised to be hated,
But I can't stand to hate.

Things will get so much better,
And you will have the same.
With all that is held back and hidden,
I begin to shake.

For You My Dear Sweet Brother,
For You are who He Saved.
As we take Heaven Onward,
They divert their gaze!

Because in This World We Have Options- Feb12, 2014

Written by Shayla D. Smith
Because in this World there is pain
I'll turn it around.
When you are the one
In the middle
You get everyone's bad days
Even when you are not
The Broken one
You just want
To raise your voice,
Rub it in their faces.
I cannot stand
The judgement
Of issues I'm over
So, I think I'll tell them
Before rock bottom
Is their truth
I'll take a step in your derection.
Gotta hand you my medicine.
Will you twist and turn it
Into Destruction?
Gotta hand you my Medicine.
Will you twist and turn it
Into destruction or make God your Hero,
Because there are options?
My Ex-Role.-

Honesty (What I got from every Emo song I heard in the 00's)- March 10, 2014

Written by Shayla D. Smith
My Mind is What is the matter
And although I see it all the time
The mistakes are marked in red.
And these little Yellow pills are
What slows me Down.

But if you knew that pain of that fire,
Of that unquenchable flame
That threatens and precedes me
I can never get along.

 You could see why I
Never quite fit in with you
And never was able to let go.
And had to walk home alone
Even walking the other way
As you raced on.
And that's all it took
For your domination.

So, I'll pick another straw and
What did you come up with?
I had a pair, but
Someone stole the other half
Now I'm stuck with only one drink
And only one way out.
I'll leave before the last glass drops to the floor.

I think I got the better Half.

Desire? How much do you Weigh?

Written by Shayla D. Smith

Fitting so much better,
Saying number Two,
Forget it,
Think I'll take a number,
Family History Time,
While they make due,
This year I found another,
Whenever life overflows,
I look at one of your Works,
Others just trying to make it to the Last supper,
Kings have been long overdue.
I will sup alone.
As Christ has tread the Wine Press alone
I take these steps towards Heaven.
I will sup with You.
Forever thin.
I have to do this.
I have found the Kings Chalice.
"Forgive Me ,but I think I saved you."

"You didn't really save Me.
And ,Oh I never saw you alone.
True I carried this grudge my whole life.
Not to end up alone,
But to be forbidden and disfigured
With ugliness comparing itself to my wounds.
Where is this Christ Child then?
You who compares herself to Mary?

"I thought I told you?  I am not She ,but He the Creator of this poem,

Written by Shayla D Smith

Open Toed Shoes

Fitting, so much better,
Saying number two
Forget it,
I'll take a number,
Family History Time,
Never bothered to find another.
Whenever life overflows,
I take a look at you.
Trying to make it to the last Supper.
Finally, found the Kings Chalice.
Christ has tread the wine press alone.
He has given me to drink alone.
I will sup with you.
Forever thin.
Never to Parish.

Then we are Pigs, who have had hardly any.
Before I wrote about desire and how much of it's weight,
There were open toed shoes.
You think we are especially ugly?
Well, I've got one for you......
So, that no man would desire us.......
If that is what you do?
I have shown you mercy and tonight your Children will fight you.

Christ is Beautiful-

Typing my Eyes out

Switch to your left

right left, right, left

Somehow I knew, 

The combination.

God couldn't stand Me.

But He opened the

Gate and l et me in.

I was twice broken.

Slipped and almost fell at the gate.

He grinned and then lifted,

Me with his hand.

You hurt me he said.

And We started to cry.

I took my place.

He led me among

The leaders, friends still.

Soft glow in my Memory.

"I followed that feeling.

I did what I could.

My talents are humble

I hope I did good."

"My Picasso, My Audrey,

My Nephi, My Moroni, and

Mary."  You

Said. I was Beautiful

When men said that I was no good.

You Said that you'd suffer,

And You stayed looking good.

I'd say, "You finished that Whore."

We will never see her again, 

And I will finish the Score. 

God is the Light.  

Tears in Blue- August 28, 2014

Written by Shayla D Smith

Wept tears of Glass .
Felt like vinegar in place of Water.
Solids taken three days after.
Sharp and torn, yet
Never do those words to progress seem
Better than, "He said, She said."
Gives me strength to Escape
From the entry.
Here is the Fire Escape
Save a few tonight.
Climbed that mountain
I think I saved a village,
Yet I might have saved a city
And felt rejected by the Mayor.
I sit and spit upon the floor,
And make clay for their eyes.
They have turned to blue!
I think yours are blue too!
Mine look a blueish hugh,
As much as they have
Seen the World in Blue!

Better Then A Name- July 24, 2014

Written by Shayla D Smith

Wore that skirt too many times.
But I'm so glad that it flatters my frame.

Bought it twelve years ago.
Thought it seems okay even though a lot has changed.

Wouldn't call that Dude a, "Loser",
Though He likes throwing names.

We are better people to each other
Then we will ever be to the Game.

They all say ,"Prove it to Me."
Then let me see your shame.

There is a better way that says,
"This War is half way over
When you told me it wasn't just a game.

Now You have Mercy.
You prove to Me You are not just a Name.

Fireside- August 11, 2014

Written by Shayla D. Smith

About When things Workout

About When things Workout (Last night)"
Full of air this Man was!
He wanted to be popular.
Never thought someone could Be so frail.
Something has changed.
And I keep telling people why.
But they don't care.
It's changing generations now.
For some reason
Those who wouldn't grow up think that they are better then me.
So, I stopped talking to them.
They got what they wanted.

He See's My Worth- April 26, 2014

Written by Shayla D Smith

I don't have a mind to fight you anymore,
So I'll just walk in and out,
Eat my Portion,
Spell your name wrong.
Then everyone will hate Me.
So I've made my Share of Mistakes.
Felt this way as a child,
Where I feel my Dad is Disappointed.
I'm trying my hardest.....
Which is to be like him,
But He's a Book,
And my Dad is a Doctor.

You're SomeBody's Hero-May 22, 2014

Written by Shayla D. Smith

I Don't know a Better Name,
But, "You're Somebody's Hero."
It's not just a game,
And it's always fair.
What are we made of?
Pearl and Polished stone,
Or tar and rot?
We are what we have yearned for.
Have we spent our time studying God
Or the Father of Lies?
Were we being polite
Or feasting and drinking of the fat happily?
Are we cursing God when we fall
Or are we laughing and getting back up.
You see, when God gives us a gift,
It is appreciated by the wise
And the other only lust and envy the gift
Waisting energy and destroying its beauty.
So ,don't tare someone down just because
You don't think they are pretty.
And you don't think you should show some pity
Because some people aren't just people,
But are Somebody's Hero,
That have saved Somebody's soul,
That have gone about saving souls. 

Loyalty to Frozen Meals - Feburary 4, 2014

Written by Shayla D Smith

There is a Strength

That is Born

Making it's Way

Through

The Crust

Of This Shell

Of Humor

Into

This Diet

Of Loyalty

To Sugar Free Soda,

Apples,

And Frozen Meals.

An Admiration to 

The Talent

Of Healthy Exercise

Of Loneliness

That they don't 

Seem to notice

At all.

Attitude Rules- February 9, 2014

Written By Shayla D Smith

This Poem is about letting go of childhood dreams that realistically cannot happen to the degree that we wish, but having a positive attitude and taking on new challenges that can be just as amazing.

An extension of my leg
My body twists and turns.
I know the movement
From the depths and crevasses
Of my ancient soul.
But ,somehow ,when I look
In the mirror,
I don't know
If I should trust  the steps,
Or forfeit the test.
Believe in miracles
When I walk away
Do not Mourn,
But grieve today.
With an honest mind,
The soul is willing
And the mind is true
So, I'll let go of you
To another........
That was a Miracle Too.
Not for Me,
But God has something for You.

"There are no Strangers Here." -September 22, 2014

Written by Shayla D Smith

When they said that was crazy,
They looked directly at you.
Not because you are,
But because everyone was looking directly at you too.
You see, smell, feel, taste, and hear.
But there are strange miracles happening too.

He see's that you are morning.
Now figure it out.
There is no one called a stranger,
When you feel there is no doubt.
You'll tell me your secrets and I'll spell it out.

I was broken last Morning,
My senses not right.
These Spiritual things,
You have placed them and I have written them down.

Now that I am your "Guy"
Will you allow me to be just, and to be right?
How many people have to abuse their Spiritual sight.
Almost lose it and ,leave it behind?

Do unto others ,my Friend
As they do unto you?
Isn't that the rule they expect us to do?
No, it's love one another as Christ has loved You!

My Christ ,My Redeemer ,you have opened my eyes.
I feel polished this evening,
For this Song won't let it die.

Lesson to Learn

     Sometimes we have to reply to the rule ,"Turn the other Cheek," after we have suffered, because of something unfair that was done to us and that "Unkind Person" who hurt us is too selfish or cruel to appreciate our Sacrifice ;they are still hurting us, maybe we should look into trying another approach.  There is the rule, "Do unto others as you would have others do unto you."  In-which, you could look at it this way and treat others the exact way they have treated you after you have tried being nice to them.  Christ has the higher law though that says, "Love one another as I have loved You."    He is our Advocate, Coach, Healer, Friend and Savior who gives us laws and his Spirit.  Choosing to love People the way Christ loves us is allowing him to be our Older Brother and really take control of things before our hearts are smashed to pieces.  The Church is supposed to protect us from harm and it can if it looks at it's members as their children and itself as it's Older Brother Protecting them.  First of all learn the facts and don't leave anyone in the Dark as far as the Truth is concerned.  "Find someone who speaks the Truth and you have saved the Nation."  Written By- Shayla D. Smith

An Eternal Creation- May 23, 2012

Written by Shayla D Smith

Guns were loaded,
But I have forfeited the draw.
To be with you my Lord.
You are creation.
Outstretched are your arms,
Mild and at peace,
And the World wants Peace.
I will do anything.
Say anything.
To go back to Thee,
And I will become part
Of an Eternal creation,
Mild and at peace.

To Be Brave- July 13, 2012

Written by Shayla D. Smith

It feels like Monday.
It's Friday the 13th!
So....
Knowledge
What do you mean?
I  think I'll skip school.
Never the same.
Forgot what I was saying.
But at times I still act Brilliant.
I know.
Even without my lessons,
Geometry,History, Spelling
The Basics.
To Walk, to See ,to Be.
I'm Brave like You.
May We be Brave Today,
And Be Braver Than What We See.

Faith -July 2, 2012

Written by Shayla D. Smith

They tell me that when you when you feel for others,
Your eyes dilate and grow,
But I'm sorry to break it to you Baby,
Mania and My Meds. do the same ,you know.
So, listen to your consense when it tells you,
To leave me alone ,or if it tells you,
"Hey, I have this Girls number,
I hope there is something and it will grow."

From the Beginning of His List (As Painted Glass)- June18 , 2013

Written by Shayla D. Smith

He formed the Future.

One kind, no more real in light ,then in the night.

There came this Soldier

Red and Gold, as Painted Glass ,or Fire in the Night

To him I give my Heart Song

And look to him with Tearful Eyes.

He has Polished Me. (Much ,must still be.)

He has given me this room,

Full of creations,

I have like trophies for the fight.

Me, like a grain of sand.

Yet I feel  set apart by the light.

You Who Lived the Longest -Janurary 22, 2014

Written by Shayla D Smith

Straightway ,through the scene.
I see you made your way.
The Enemy, with a Pitiful Performance.
The Undertaker Died.
He wasn't the Star,
But God Bless.
I'll listen for your lines.
As you made the Show...
And every body cheered,
Because it was You,
Who lived the longest.
It was your Victory!

Now a Place of Healing- February 26, 2013

Written by Shayla D Smith
We all have a Demon.
Mine was a Woman.
I saw her for an instant
And then went back to sleep.
She looked ashamed,
But gave a smirk.
Thinking that she had won
As I winced in pain.
She pretended to be lovers.
She wanted to be Jesus ,prophets,
A singer, and Heavenly Father.
She tried to imitate the Spirit,
And at times called herself
Death and perdition.
She left me bound and broken,
But I Found myself crawling out of the darkness.
I called to my Heavenly Father for safety.
He took me in his arms.
From my worst place before,
Now a place of healing.

My Ashes- May 5, 2013

Written by Shayla D. Smith

My Cancer Star,
Burns my Dreams to Ash,
But I refuse to give into it.
My will keeping Me alive.
Still, I don't remember a thing since yesterday.
Only that I woke up
Alone in my bed.
Just another day
What's the difference between
Today and Yesterday?
Just a little less of Me around
And a lot of this grey ash.

From the Beginning of His List- June 18 ,2013

Written by Shayla D Smith

He formed the future.
One kind, no more real in light, then in the night.
To him I give my Heart song
And look at him with tearful eyes.
He  has polished Me.  (Much, must still be.)
He has given Me this room
Full of our creations,
I have like trophies for the fight.
Me, like a grain of sand.
Yet, I feel set apart in the light.

On Beaches and Streets- Janurary 29, 2013

Written by Shayla D. Smith

Nothing Changes
But the Scenery
People might leave more crumbs
More trash, balloons,
And on the Beaches, Alka Selzer.
One by one they fall,
Dead Washed away in the tide.
Or playing Dead on big City Streets.
Sick and wasted people sleep.
The Other's, well only a few Hours.
Do you sleep?
I don't know?

Half dead on the pavement?
Just falling so awkward.
Are you one of these sick and wasted people,
Or one of those birds being fed Alka Selzer?

Those Who Have Hurt Have Loved, But Who Have They Loved?- Thursday , Feburary 7, 2013

Written by Shayla D. Smith

1. Now 2. You 3. Have........ Gifts and Dreams of Color
I seek your presence
Now is a gift
From your Desires,
Yearnings,
And good Habits.

A little Sun might have
Done you well
But in your eyes
I have begun to see
Much more color.
Now I can tell
You Secrets.
In so many dreams.

1. Now, I find you parched
Upon this sandy hill
Saying that you never knew a Heavenly Father,
When I know he was holding you back
Because he knew what would kill you

2. You were in love
Stayed in the box.
Followed the lines that told you
Where to cut
And where to fold.

3. Have you ever felt that
Each step was planned out,
But you had no idea
Where or What was at the finish line?

Falling in Love to The Sore Left Behind- January 27, 2013

Written by Shayla D. Smith

I thought that I'd catch you in my web,

But you were too good for such a game.

You ripped through my web.

Your Human form stronger,

Than those mighty sticky cords,

But I could sneak up on you 

And bite you as you sleep,

Exchange poison for your blood,

Now you got me love sick and,

Thinking only of this Widow,

As you suffer the sore left behind.

Saying, "I can change things between us."

Love sick again,

From someone who stole from you.

You'd sing along,

Because you didn't know 

Any other way of falling in love.

Love Smart-July 2 2012

Written by Shayla D. Smith

Iris pierce
Soft yet ,complex
Turns each number
Quick
It's my complex.

So ,Why am I So fallen,
Or Why am I putting on a show?
Each number is with you,
For you, Babe.

So, Please
Don't you think that
If there where others,
My friend, it would show?
I hold such an afterglow
For even a little and each time it grows.

But I tell you now that,
I will never be another's master
Unless his love will love and never let go.

Generosity- Feberary 10 ,2012

Written by Shayla D. Smith

Grant Me your poetic generosity,
Your fluid Speech,
Your loving embrace.
You give Me my future ,present, and past.
I will sleep and rest,
While you sing my song.
Tell me if it's too forward, harsh, or rude,
And I will do the same for you.
I love you.

My House- January 28 ,2012

Written By Shayla D. Smith


Cement Bricks,
I'll build my house,
So freshly painted,
Granting such normalcy,
Discouraged, but glares do not rule,
So kind to remind me,
So I'll put on my apron,
And Scrub that floor,
As long as you are by my side,
Watching, Proud.

Seeing Stars In My Room- January 9, 2012

Written by Shayla D. Smith

Seven day rest
Taken with Water
Be my Night Sky,
My Stars, My Full Moon.
Smelling the other rose.
Taping it dried on my Wall,
And calling it Freedom.
Cheap trade for
A Starlit Night
Is this burning cocoon,
But tonight here I feel
You in my room.
Close to you I go,
Sweet sky,
Sweet rose,
Sweet stars,
Where're you go,
You are not far,
You seem to be Here.